she lets him go because she’s so afraid of loving,
for the first time.
he’s so confused because he sees it hurts her,
in her eyes.
he doesn’t know what he said or where he went wrong,
all that’s known is the closest thing he ever had to love is gone.
“i don’t think i can go on without your hand in mine, he said,
and i don’t want to go on,
wasting so much time
looking for someone else that i am.
i just need someone to help me understand.
and i hope that i can hold off on life and love like you can.”
and he sits at home and does nothing but stare
out his window, but the world he watches doesn’t give a care.
the phone rings and rings until the person on the other end hangs up.
he still sits and waits,
he’s waiting for it all to stop.
“and who’s supposed to help me get through a hurt when i can’t love you, he
why can’t i hide the pain in a box under my bed like i used to?
i keep playing the day over and over,
crying in my mind.
why does having someone love you have to be such a crime?
now i know i’m wasting all of mine,
sitting here watching time”
the days will go on, but his heart will still hurt,
the nights will slide by, but he still wears the shirt
the one that carries the pain tattooed to his sleeve,
he can’t take off the shirt, the pain won’t leave.
“i’m hoping this will be the day when i can say goodbye, he said,
when the good feelings come and the bad spirits fly,
i think to be over, but then i see your face in sky of this world .
i see your eyes the sun,
your hair the trees,
your tears the watered swirl..
and now i know you’ll always be with me,
if not in life, in my mind, in my world.”
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